A Note on Friendship
According to the New Oxford American Dictionary (Apple Dictionary), a friend is a person whom one knows and with whom one has a bond of mutual affection, typically exclusive of sexual or family relations; a person who is not an enemy or who is on the same side. But in reality, there is so much more to say about its meaning. It is like “love” and “art”, there is no specific definition. Each has their own value for the word. So let me share my take on it.
When I say you’re my friend, it only takes me a maximum of 7 days to level-up or demote your status. Level-up in a sense that I want you to be my close friend, wherein we share secrets and all, and demote like we’re slowly having a gap between us, which I like because I don’t think we can go anywhere else. Because I say your my friend for two reasons: One, if we bond often (and i should probably be really enjoying your company) or two, if I’m very comfortable when I’m with you (instant friends). I’m not being cruel or anything, you shouldn’t waste your time with a bunch of jerks. You have to realize that life is short, so make the most out of it. And I believe, it would be better if you spend it with the people you truly love. I am not always right with my decisions, because sometimes I tend to lose the people who could have been my close friends for I thought they weren’t supposed to be my friends. But I’m not regretting my choices as well, if not for my kinda wrong judgments, i couldn’t have possibly found my best friends.
But the thing is, when we say someone is our friend, whether he eventually becomes our best friend or not, he will always have a special space in our heart, that we should not forget. Because sometimes, when one becomes our friend, then in the process we gain another friend, and we enjoy the company of the second person more, we are inclined to make the first person a little less than he should be, as a friend of course. Which is obviously wrong. This is not a competition. There should be no rankings among them. When we give a part of ourselves to someone we call “friend”, we should give them the treatment they rightfully deserve. No matter how many they are, regardless of their social status or educational attainment, we should give them of equal importance. Because they are our friends. That itself is an enough reason for the said action to be done.
Also, when one becomes our friend, we shouldn’t expect anything from him. We are not suppose to set standards or a list of tasks. For if any of these start to rise, then maybe we just have to stop the friendship. It’s not heading for the right direction. They have minds and free will, let them handle their lives. The reason why you have this bond is for you to grow together as a person. And once you oblige or compel him to be someone else, you’re putting an end to that person’s development. So selfish to do such a thing. Our point of existence is for us to be with them whenever they need us, to be a shoulder to lean on, to enlighten them during their dark moments, to cheer them up when they are sad, to offer them a hand when they can’t carry the burden anymore, etc. We are basically each others NUMBER ONE FAN. Imposing anything on them is one of the worst things you can do. Respect them and their decisions. It’s all about respect anyway. It is a give and take relationship, don’t be a bitch and just take and take without giving back anything in return.
This is a reminder for everyone. As we progress in our lives, we should not leave this piece of note behind. We have a propensity to forget the most important lesson in life just because something, we think, is more important. Often, the things we value less in the present, become the priceless things in the future. Don’t do anything that you will regret someday. Losing a friend is probably one of the hardest things to accept. So as much as possible, do not take any of your friends for granted. They are not your toys. Respect them. Cherish them. Treasure them. Love them.